hopeful

I was talking with a friend the other day about her recent breakup. She’s a beautiful girl, someone you wouldn't think would have boy problems. But she’s had them plenty. It seems beauty doesn’t really save you from broken hearts after all, despite what the world tells you. She was talking about what she’d done to contribute to this particular relationship failing. She was candid about her own faults but she also didn’t mince words about what her ex had done (or didn't do.) In the end, it is still those broken promises he so famously and loudly made to everyone who cared to listen that haunt her and keep her from fully moving forward.

At the end, it’s really that, though, yes? When promises you held on to suddenly are made to be meaningless and void. It’s the betrayal of trust that cuts deep and clings hard. More than the angry words, the disappearance, the emotional turmoil. It’s the memory of words and the meaning those words carried, the weight they ended up having because they were said with love or what looked like it.

We forget too often that our words carry weight. Especially when they’re stated as vows and promises. There used to be a time when these were as good as a contract. But now we live in a world where promises broken have become not just normal but expected.

I've been burned badly before and it took me quite some time to get over the hurts and I still feel scared most of the days but I still believe in them. And I know people like me who want to believe in them nonetheless still abound.

I know enough to be praying for this even now. I have a list of non-negotiables that I pray to God for.. qualities I find important, character traits I can’t do without in my future husband. One of them is that he be a man of his word, a man of integrity. That when he says something, he means it...and works on it as soon as possible. And, in turn, I pray I become that woman, too. A woman whose word anyone can hinge their hope on. A woman who makes promises she keeps. At the very least, people should have that—honesty, integrity, strength, conviction, faith, perseverance. Maybe then, this joyfully ever after won’t be so hard to have.

In the meantime, this beautiful friend of mine tries to make do with her lot in life. But she also has a hope that what God has taken away, God will replace with better. Because when He does, He always does. Now that’s a promise that will never be broken.