thoughts-full thursday

had an impromptu dinner to celebrate a good friend's birthday party late this evening at her house. i met some new friends and we started sharing our stories. the more common topic being the difficulties we have in life these days which varied from problems at work, at home or with our relationships and maybe even all of the above.

a friend said that maybe shitty things happen because we attract them, maybe because as drama as they seem, we are "comfortable" with it, and maybe even some are attached to that drama (that even if you know you have to do something about it NOW, you can't...and you make excuses why you just can't fix the problem). or maybe because we can't let go for a certain reason. so the shitty things become a cycle, happening again and again and again and we complain, we feel bad. but maybe, these things happen again because we still haven't learned our lesson - or refuse to learn our lesson from it. true, God won't give us anything we can't bear but he also gave us freewill, and that freewill should help us in moving forward, in choosing to do something. in learning our lesson and saying enough coz once we've decided to act now and move forward, greater things will come our way. the best will come our way.

those things got me thinking again......

crossing and burning

just a lot of things on my mind. i dunno where to start.

‎...Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops?
What if Your healing comes through tears?
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near?
What if my greatest disappointments or the aching of this life is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy?
What if trials of this life, the rain, the storms, the hardest nights, are Your blessings in disguise?

hmmmmmmmmmm.............

why do i suddenly have a "hmmmmmmm..." moment?

g'nyt!

more surprises!

 

thanks Bree for a new box of cinnabon just when the other box was empty + Jug for the KK!

thank you, unknown sender!

my day was sooooooooooooo packed but it had sweet surprises along the way!

i am very thankful.

"You want a love that consumes you. You want passion. And adventure. And even a little danger."
-- Damon, TVD

i was like this before

...but change is good. really good.

because coffee isn't the same without you

i miss our coffee dates

full Friday!

my day started with a conference at PRC

i wasn't able to finish it because i had another meeting at 3pm so i left for school and i was surprised to find these:

               

  

 our meeting ended late so we decided to have dinner at one of our favorite restaurants and look who got her belated birthday cake!

today was full of things to do and some emotional stresses too, but like I said, there will always be something to be thankful for and today those were the surprises that came my way and the love I have now that I know will last forever.

HBBTM!

just got back from giving a lecture to three of my classes that I merged into one schedule (for today). we were sharing some thoughts which led to sharing some of our life experiences. i shared mine and then i realized that it was the first time that i was able to fully talk about that thing. also, it was talked about in a positive light, in a not bitter, hopeful way.

wow.

sometimes i do surprise myself.

i love surprises!

i got four this busy busy very tiring day

  

the chocolates are from a former student, the gift from my doctor friend, the book from a suppplier. now, the rose I do not know who from but i am thankful. for all of them.

oh, and i got to listen to two great speakers this afternoon too! i thought it would be another boring meeting but once again, i was surprised.

i am thankful that despite the busy-ness and everything that I am feeling, there are still a lot to be grateful for.
*now if only....... =)))))

 =======================

and speaking of surprises....

At the beginning of this year, three close friends asked me to pray for them. they were telling me how so out of reach their wishes were. a little while ago, two chatted me up and told me they claimed! and the other sent me a sms telling me she got her prayers answered too. wow.

I remember also praying to God for clarity … for doors favorable to remain open and doors that aren’t to shut. I remember praying to be used for His purpose.

He’s answered those prayers, too...and He surely sent a lot of surprises my way.

I still have a lot of prayers waiting to be answered but it's just the second week of September. I know and I believe in my heart that they will all be answered in due time.

surprises. i just love them.

before i sleep

the past week have been emotionally-stressful for myself and for my loved ones as well. I was tossing and turning up most nights, scared, a lot of questions on my mind.

now that things are looking up, the skies are getting brighter, i just have to say this

for loving us and giving what's best.

thank you.

Amen.

"Were not going back, we are moving forward..."

Dear Mama Mary,

When i saw the pic at a friends facebook page, I was reminded of something.

A few years back, i remember this date. It was during lunchtime mass. I was there way early and I was praying, asking you to give me back what I lost.

During the sermon, said those words in the picture and in the title. And so I prayed. I asked you to bring back the loss or else to help me let go.  I asked you to take away the pain that that loss has been giving me. I asked you to give me a reason to finally let go because I want to be ready for something better.

It took a few months until I got the answer I was looking for. And what was special about it was that it was during the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. Dec 8. I met an aunt, who during our conversation, gave me the reason I have been praying for. It was liberating. I then knew I really had to let go of what happened so I could get myself ready for something better.

And ready i did get.

It has been years since that happened and now, once again, on your birthday, I received some answers to questions that have been bugging me for quite some time. grace. blessings.

It's your birthday and through the years, you have always been very generous to me. thank you so much. Thank you for everything. For the blessings - the wonderful surprises that came my way.  And
I am now asking you to intercede for me. I have this one wish - this one thing my heart so desires. I know I am ready for it. We are ready for it.

Please help me. Us.
Please.

Happy birthday Mama Mary!
Love you!

There is never a time or place for true love. It happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment.

hmmmm.......

i know i can be quite paranoid but usually, when i  feel these things, i end up right.

so why do i feel that something is being hidden from me? that i am not getting the entire picture?
that i am not being told everything?

oh please say it aint so

give me strength

It's amazing how just about a week ago - despite things not going my way - I was sooooooooooooooooo happy I could burst and now I am filled with so much fear and sadness.
I don't understand why things like this happen but I have faith the best thing will happen. After all,what I always pray for is the best -whether that includes me or not.

i am tired of smiling and pretending things are ok. it's not. it's scary. the future is starting to get bleak.
i am sooooooooooo scared. so scared.

sometimes all it takes is one message

and then another
and another

bad sad news since this morning

it just tugs at my heartstrings =(

For my girl M: Once upon a time

....there was a really great girl who met a really nice boy. They became great friends and he would call her, bring her out, make her laugh and make her feel really really special. It wasn’t long before she found herself falling for him. Their friendship remained and grew stronger and deeper and from time to time, the girl would question whether he was falling for her too. 
One day, the boy called the girl and told her that he liked another girl — a sort-of popular girl. This broke the girl’s heart but she decided to stick around because she loved the friendship. He’d date then break up, date then break up — but he would always come back to her. She was the one who nursed his broken heart, cushioned the rejection and caught his fall. She was there through all his misgivings and mess ups and failures. He’d give her ice cream and books and nice smiles but never his heart. Or he’d give her his heart but never completely. He steered far away from commitment and real definite love. One day, when she was finally brave enough to do so, she asked the Big Question: “What are we?” And the boy shrugged his shoulders and said: “Well, I like you. There’s definitely something. But I just don’t see it going anywhere.”

Do you see where this is going?

saturday

Do you ever just wanna hug someone so tightly to the point where you have absolutely no intentions of ever letting go because you want them to know just how much they mean to you and how much you love them and you just wanna take away all the bad things in their life and replace them with only good things?