moving forward....

It's a few hours before the Chinese New Year.  Now, my family is not Chinese but new years always get to me. It's full of hope to move on. To move forward.  However, before we can even think of moving forward, I personally feel that I can’t do that without first looking back.

What went well, what (totally) failed, what lessons were learned (or were sometimes force-fed) in the year that passed.

This was a big year for me: not because I was able to achieve a lot, but because 2013 was probably the most heartbreaking year I’ve ever had to go through.

I made a long list of my 2013 highlights and milestones, as well as my low points and disappointments, and what I’ll share with you today are shorter, summarized version of each list!

Now let’s take a look at that rearview mirror:

1. Claire, Grace and Sarah, three of my superduper childhood-we were friends since sperm- friends went home in January. we definitely had a blast with all our childhood friends - dinagyang, surprise parties, boracay, reminiscing. we may have grown up but deep down, we are still little girls and boys at heart.

2. I attended two Pharmacy Summits. The second one was even more special because I went with my students. I also attended the Nat Con and met longlost friends and longlost former students. it was just nice catching up with them.

3. We welcomed baby grom-grom in february. He had a difficult time in the hospital, having been in the incubator and transfused for quite a number of times.

4. I attended my first free international concert. Jars of Clay  was simply amazing! Later in the year, I was able to watch another concert with my best friend. Oh, how fun that was!

5. Rhea and Maj, with her hubby Tope, had their summer vacation here. Welcoming Tope to the barkada was so much fun!

6. Tatay and I had a mini-trip! Three days lang but it was fun seeing him be amazed with all things new in a place he last saw almost 15 yrs ago.

7. I went on an impromptu trip and ended up in Gigantes! it was just lovely!

8. My bday month had me in such a flurry that I was even surprised it was my birthday already.  I started the month with The Humanitarian Affairs Int'l Symposium. It was eyeopening. It was surely an honor representing YPG-Phils. Then Davey got home with lil Angelo and we had a lot of bonding moments, sometimes with Nina  (who is one busy bee), too.

9. I was finally able to make one of my wishes come true: review and the go signal for the board exam here in the province. It was nice meeting new people and learning from them and taking them to different places here. I hope our newly formed ties will last beyond the walls of the review rooms.

10. We participated in a survey with UP peeps. It was another learning experience for me. And to share that with my coteachers and students? priceless.

11. Lastly, i was promoted. I'm no longer "acting". I see it more as a bane than a boon but if it's something that would make me able to do the things i want to help the department, then i am up for it.

12. The saddest parts of 2013 was losing people I love. I lost two aunts, some relative, and a cousin just days before Christmas.

13. I struggled with my emotions in 2013 and had a breakdown. I never thought I could reach my breaking point. It felt so ugly. so bad. at times, I could still feel myself being pulled to that darkness. It's a constant struggle, something I know I will be fighting still this year.

I’ve always liked the New Year because it always meant that everything seems new and fresh and there are always infinite possibilities. I am so done with 2013, not because it was a bad year (despite it being heartbreaking for most parts) but because I am ready for the next year. I am infinitely thankful for all people sent my way, good or bad, they certainly made my 2013 something to remember.

welcome 2014! let's be friends!